Disclaimer: This is solely an expression of my thoughts and bears no resemblance to anyone – living or dead.
For a girl in India, your 24th birthday will probably be the most profound moment of your life – at least till then. Yet within that anticipation lurks a sense of dread. The impressive birthday haul is going to come at a price called matrimony.com! From your colleagues to next door neighbours, everyone will have an opinion. Not to be left behind is the Aunt. She makes it her personal mission to lead the troop of groom-hunters and establishes the initial screening process to be followed in the coming years months. You will avoid family functions like a plague just to escape intense talks of your future and the loaded “Have you found someone yet?”
“Arranged marriages” are very much a reality in India. Its popularity refuses to relinquish its firm hold in spite of the increase in the number of “love marriages”. If the girl wants to study after 25, she will be bombarded with the ear-worm of “your demand will go down in the market if you wait longer”. Many girls give in with a cynical acceptance of duty and tradition. Arranged marriage is the plan B when your holiday ends or the summer fling doesn’t work out.
Like everyone else, I have my share of doubts. I was a loud propagator of a love match and often used the lines, “I’ll fall in love and then marry” and “I cannot imagine coming out with samosas for a strange guy and his family”. Ah! Now I wonder if I have been too quick to judge. What is so dreadful and horrifying about arranged marriage that many of my female friends take flight? Let’s see! It gives you an opportunity to date guys (read: three coffees) with sanction, get an insight into his family and culture, a background check of his life and lifestyle, with full approval from both sides. No drama about caste, salary, family background etc that are often the prominent flavours of love marriages in India. Today, you get the time and space to know the person with the fun reality that there is no beating around the bush! Right from start you know why you meeting and what is the anticipated end result (start of a new journey, maybe?). So if you find him… Win-win!
I think *scratching head*
It all comes down to whether we are ready for it or not. Yeah! We want our perfect love story and romantic proposals. But maybe we won’t work at innovative ploys and ridiculous reasons to get out of the arranged marriage scene. There is no guarantee of success – it’s a chance either way. If the mind, body and soul are prepared and positive, then why not give it a try. It will work out if and when we want it to. An open-mind and an open-heart is all it takes!
P.S. This is NOT a subtle plea to anyone (mom) to start finding “prospects” for me. No!! Not yet!
Written for The Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt: Find. Stream of consciousness writing means no editing (barring typos) and minimal planning on what to write.
What are your thoughts?