For the longest time, I held unwavering perceptions of people. They were bound within the confines of the labels anointed – Mom, Dad, Teacher, Elder Sister, or just plain “Adult”. In my head, the parents could do no wrong; they were secure and unblemished on their pedestal where I had placed them. Similar expectations were laid on the other adults in my life. The formula was simple: Adults have the answers. Adults are the solutions.
The term human never really applied to them, until it applied to me. Until there was a world beyond black and white. Until there was a tricky middle ground of subjectivity at the edge of which I was precariously balanced. That is when I started to extend the liberty of making mistakes to myself and my peers. After all, it is probably the most natural thing in the world.
And finally, came a day when I extended the same courtesy to my parents (and the other adults, but obviously the key are my parents). I took them off the pedestal and gave them the freedom to be, and in the process took a weight off my shoulders of trying to view the world as per the lenses I believed I was expected to see.
In that moment, I looked at the person beyond the label and tried to catch a glimpse of their journey and their pains, of their unfulfilled dreams and their doubts. It taught me to forgive, for all the times I felt they should have done something different with me. It also taught me the meaning of unconditional love, of taking in the load of good along with the pinch of “bad”.
The view up from the ground was assuring to say the least, but now at eye level where I have allowed blemishes to touch them, the perspective is now pure and beautiful and familiar.
Great post 😁
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I think this is part of the process of growing up and maturing – to see our parents as regular human beings. It’s strange, but I somehow feel closer to them, even though they have passed on. You have good insights.
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Yes.. So True my Friend.. We Do Need Rose Colored
Glasses that not only Enjoy the Flowers of others
but are Brave Enough to See the Thorns too
And Tolerate them and even
Accept them as We Can
too For True Life
Will surely
Be Laden
With Thorns
That many folks
Hide Inside Afraid to
Expose but it is the Scars
From those Thorns that Truly
Make the Tissues that Wipe the
Tears from our Heart the Flesh and
Blood of our Soul that comes to Be
So Much of who we are through Tears
That become Strength through Grace of
Balance that Becomes Will from a Foundation
of Love
that
comes from
An Ocean of Raging Waves
To Calms Seas of Waves We
Become..
NoW As
Ocean Whole Harmony
Being Human at Peace..:)
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I believe it to be a process of growing up and maturing, evolving so to say. It happens with time, and out thoughts change and mature ad sometimes we prove our older version wrong.
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Lovely piece. An essential moment in the progress of maturity, to see our parents are people and to then extend them grace and forgiveness on their own journeys.
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nicely written Prajakta. hope all’s well with you 🙂
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I think the freedom to make mistakes is extremely liberating. And part of the growing up process. Nicely articulated.
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Thank you for sharing Prajakta. We change within ourselves as we grow older and part of that is our perception of others. With my own father dying when I was 15, I have always held him on a very high pedestal. If he were still living when I was say 45, I would definitely see him differently. Thank you for sharing something very deep within yourself. You are an amazing human being! 🙂
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I think we all grow up from idolizing our parents to considering them as humans 🙂 and as you said with this realization you do good not just to yourself but to them as well 🙂 Beautiful post 🙂 How have you been? Happy New Year 🙂
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