The last Poetics of this year at dVerse where we are writing about stars. I couldn’t help but talk about my last night at my institute, a bunch of friends up a particularly forbidden terrace. A time of retrospection and farewells, literally on top of the world overlooking the valley with spectacles of at least ten shooting stars.
“Growing apart doesn’t change the fact that for a long time we grew side by side; our roots will always be tangled. I’m glad for that.” ― Ally Condie
The date September 5, 2014 looms in my head. My greatest friend and assumed sister will be taking off to Lala land for her education in medicine, and I am clueless about my feelings. The distance between us will no more be just a hop, skip and jump away. This time we will navigate thousands of miles, different time zones and erratic chore schedules to work out this long-distance friendship.
My heart misses a beat randomly when I think of your departure and my eyes blink over-time (Give me a diagnosis, Miss Mad Doctor). I remember the two of us sitting in Class 6A (middle row, last bench) where I was talking in English and you were gently correcting me. I had no idea that those tentative conversations would lead to more than a decade of absolutely nonsensical yet totally logical madness. Girl, you introduced me to the joy of long phone calls, of exchanging clothes and hair style tips (err… I still don’t get braiding :P) and sleep-overs! You have more or less taught me how to be a good friend and to be there for someone, however idiotic they (read: you) maybe! I learnt to burst with pride for someone when you broke all academic records, and recognized my vengeful streak when some guy made you cry. You filled the void my sister left when she moved to hostel and never did I feel alone. I had you and that was enough.
It’s been thirteen years since we became BFFs (yea yea! I used this. So sue me), and you been wayyyy more than that. Every major decision, every major step I took was intricately linked to you and quite frankly, you have a substantial role in my achievements and what I am today. I moved out three years back, and with that I carried a guilt that I couldn’t always be there to give you a hug. I never could really appreciate what you must have felt when my train departed. We both cried buckets, but never realized that we both were crying over entirely different things. I think I understand your feelings more and more as Friday looms closer. Everything is changing and some things may not be the same. We are going through life and lifestyle changes. But it doesn’t change the fact that those amazing moments DID happen. We had a blast these 13 years, and will just create a different explosion in the future! 😀
Yes, I will be depressed for a while, more so when I come home the next time and you will not be there. Your India number may not even be active then (gasp!) But you know what babe, I want to feel and realize every emotion as you have earned every bit of it! These feelings are a result of the hard work and energy you put in to achieve this – a sign of your growth and your glowing future 🙂 It is your time to shine and make the world take note of the fine stuff you made of. You are worth it and so much more! And I promise I will not get jealous of the new friends that you will be making there or the fact that your first flat-mate is not me (Ah, our grand plans!) We will still be messaging with cheesy emoticons and laughing on Skype about the cute guy you should not be having a crush on!
So go ahead and start this exciting new phase of your life. I have always got your back and am ready to catch you whenever you stumble – be it from giddy happiness or momentary setbacks. I can wax lyrical about you and what I will do for you forever but all I want is for you to remember – you will be the god-mommy of my future kids (so behave and oh! free treatment please!) and my life really needs you to be with me! 🙂